Stop coasting through life, RIGHT NOW.

I seem to have reached a point where although I'm happy with my slimmer frame, I'm not really pushing myself as much as I should. I've tended to drift through life falling into one thing or another, after all I only got my new job after I was pushed into attending a job search course. So I seem to be getting a little slack in my exercising and dietary choices. Whenever I go swimming I only do breaststroke because its easier than front crawl and I can do a mile relatively easily, when I should be pushing myself to start doing front crawl, so I can get stronger in my swimming, I should be pushing myself when I'm on the treadmill, or rowing machine but keep telling myself, that I'm tired so that's why I'm not giving it more. The Boxercise class on a Saturday I'm trying to push myself but some of the exercises are leg work, so I'm not quite as quick as I'd like to be but I should push myself more so that like the swimming I can get stronger and therefore quicker at.

I'm no longer doing the Zumba class on a Monday because I'm weighing in that day and have work, so don't have the time anymore, the same on a Wednesday, although this is partly true, I'm using it as an excuse not to do the classes, when I should be pushing myself more, since I don't have much more weight to lose.
I'm also telling myself that because my bodybugg shows I've burned off additional calories that it doesn't matter if I eat more than I should, since hey look a calorie defict, although the way I'm going its been a handful of calories, rather than the amount which will help me continue to lose weight.

I've also gotten into an annoying habit at work, where if I have a break, I'm tending to eat something, it seems to be toast with some kind of meat, then having something sweet afterwards, since I only do five hour shifts and have a 15 minute break, this isn't too bad, its the days when I have longer shifts and therefore more breaks, I seem to be ingesting upwards of 800 calories, more if I get the urge for a chocolate bar or two. I can't seem to break out of the habit either, I do try and pick the healthiest options when it comes to the bread and meat but seem to be failing when it comes to not eating an unhealthy chocolate bar, I know I shouldn't be eating them but I guess I must have an impulse control issue when surrounded by all the sweet treats, it might be easier if I take something in with me to eat, or simply avoiding eating on my break, or minimise the amount I eat and having a piece of fruit or something.

Before I started the job, I was on a steady downward trajectory with my weight loss, then I started working and my loss seemed to stall, then I gained a couple of lbs, lost them, stayed the same for a couple of weeks, lost again and as of this morning, had gained 2 lbs again, so put me squarely back at 13st 9lbs. It just shows how easily the weight can creep back on if you aren't careful. So time to get back to being more careful with what I'm eating and avoid the chocolaty treats.

Bugger off, I don't want to feel ill

Looks like I'm coming down with with what I call fake flu, not to be confused with man flu, which is where lazy men moan about being horrendously ill, when they've probably got nothing more than a slight cold. My 'fake flu' is where I for all intents and purposes feel like a have the flu but without the pesky infection that lets me stay off work and stay in bed. My muscles ache, my sinuses get bunged up and painful, my head feels full of cotton wool, my ears block and I cough like no one's business.

I normally get this if I've been staying up too late then start getting more sleep, its like my body wants to punish me or something, I hate being unwell, I don't like feeling out of sorts it just annoys me, the worst part is I can't even go to the gym, I tried to yesterday but had no motivation for the stationary bike, I tried doing some weights but gave up after some dumbbell bench presses, my forearms were hurting even when I tried a lighter weight, managed 5 minutes on the treadmill, at 10% incline oddly enough and I did push myself to swim half a mile, although I'd have happily given up after 100 metres.

So I'm in for a few more days of working whilst feeling lousy, not being up to working out and generally being annoyed with my body for this, OH HAPPY DAYS.

What is that smell, oh wait its me burning out.

Recently I overdid my exercising, I started writing this blog post, after I'd rode to Gateshead for my Monday weigh in, which resulted in me losing another lb and putting me at 13st 13lbs(195lbs), which happily put me under the 14st level, which is something I've not weighed in I've no idea how long, I took this as a chance to ride back home the long way. I should have been doing my usual Zumba class but I just felt wrong, really tired and not right in myself. So I thought to myself, I'll go for a swim, which I knew would be easier than dancing around for an hour, so I saw a mile and walked up home.

I still felt really tired and had a look at my exercise for the previous days and that's when I noticed what I'd done, I'd eaten too few calories for the amount of exercise I'd done. For the four days in question I had exercised an approximate 8,061 calories, which is quite an impressive amount, with MyFitnessPal giving me a total calorie intake of 14,901/6,840 calories, which would have meant I'd eaten 1,710 calories, my actual intake turned out to be 11,545/3484 calories, which means my average intake was 871, which is nearly 1,000 calories fewer per day than I should have had.

I did most of my exercise over the weekend, managing to swim four miles, walk three, do two fitness classes and ride to the Metrocentre to buy a part for my bike, I felt fine on the Sunday night, it was when I woke up on the Monday, that I felt more tired than I normally do in the morning but not enough to stop me riding for my weigh in.

I think I need to be more careful in the future, as I'll find that my weight will either plateau, or worse start going back up, as my body decides that I'm starving myself, which for all intents an purposes I seem to actually be doing just this. I suppose I could have myself a bit more food, to compensate for this huge deficit but that yells counter intuitive at me, I might calm down with the swimming and concentrate on matching intake for output so that I don't end up with this happening quite so severely in future.

I'm really didn't enjoying feeling as tired and ill as I was, especially as I started to drifting off to sleep mid afternoon. I planned and ate a decent meal for my dinner and had a nice piece of cream sponge cake, in the hope that my body would reward me with not feeling ill. The knock on effect of the weekend has left me still feeling tired and the realisation that its very easy to accidentally harm yourself without meaning to.

So, no more exercising that much without eating back into the burned calories.

*looks closely* What's that *points*

When my Grandmother was pregnant with my Dad, she had a fall, this resulted in some damage to his ribcage, so he has an indentation in his chest, which causes his ribcage to jut out at the bottom. Whenever I've gone swimming recently, they have long mirrors in the toilets near the pool for some reason and I've noticed that since I lost quite a bit off my belly, my ribcage seems to protrude out slightly, this is damned annoying and I know there isn't anything that can be done aside from having my ribcage broken and reset but I don't think that's something that I'd ever consider having done.

I guess it just means there's a bit of me that won't lay completely flat but its just something else that's a bit different about me. I would have preferred a third nipple but you can't have everything can you. I suppose, I was being a bit unrealistic to expect it to be an easy journey, without any kind of bumps in the road, so I can still rejoice in the healthier slimmer me and I still have a decent enough head of hair, when my middle brother is losing his, so that's something I didn't get from my Dad.

It seems even the most rational person can have body issues, over some slight imperfection they feel that they have, be it their large feet, lop sided ears, or my ribcage, I suppose this is down to this idea we should all be perfect, with perfect hair, jobs, marriages, families and bodies. I lay the blame for this mostly at the doorstep of our media, who seem to relish showing and picking apart images of some female celebrity who has either gained a bunch of weight, commenting with an eurgh yuck, look at her attitude or incredibly proud 'you should look like this after a baby' attitude towards the images of one who has lost their pregnancy weight, always within a seemingly impossible timeframe, which would suggest that they didn't have that much to lose in the first place.

So it seems I've joined the ranks of the people who seem to have some ridiculous issue with a body part, that isn't such a big deal in the grand scheme of things, which I think means I need to give myself a damned good talking to.

Sometimes, you just need a little more.

I've had a few ups and downs in my journey towards a fitter healthier me, the weeks when no weight seemed to come off, the weeks when half a stone fell off, I can now get through a fitness class, without almost dying, boxercise and kettlebell are still hard but I'm recovering a lot quicker than I did four months ago. 

I helped with a beach survey for the Marine Conservation Society last Friday, spending an hour picking up and noting down the types of litter that was on a 100 metre patch of Marsden beach, a lovely little place I've not been to in a few years. They asked us to trawl the beach for an hour and afterwards we were provided with some snacks, drinks and a money off voucher from Marks & Spencer as a little thank you, for our hard work. I helped myself to a few extra snacks when everyone had helped themselves as they would only go to waste if they weren't eaten.

As I had some time before I was expected home, I decided to go for a bit of a longer ride than usual, heading through the Tyne tunnel and then along towards Newcastle before heading up to and across Scotswood bridge and back down past the Metrocentre before riding alongside the Tyne and up to home. After I plotted my route, it seems I'd done 34.68 miles, which I was quite surprised at and because I was in a restless mood, I thought, I think I'll go for a swim, so I did, managing a mile in the time that was left before the pool closed. Though it seems that I hurt my shoulder a little, as I'd had an accident and came off my bike on a small wooden stathes beside the Metrocentre, as it was soaking wet and very slick.

I managed to get through 6 packets of Chocolate, Pecan  Popcorn and a few other things, clocking up 950 calories in snacks, which was a bit annoying, since these were 'healthier snacks' but since my exercise weighed in at 2672 calories I think it'll be alright.

On Saturday I did my usual boxercise class then straight afterwards I did a spinning class, which was unbelievably hard, mainly I think because I'd done all the cycling on Friday but also because its so hard, especially where you float just over the seat and your quads start to scream at you, I wanted to go swimming but it seems I'd forgotten my trucks, oh well.

I had hoped to to some exercise on the Sunday but after downloading Trials Evolution, Lee and I just spent the day playing on that and creating a new track. I managed to eat a lot of food though, for some reason I was not that hungry but felt like I needed it, so my calorie intake was 1,500 calories over my daily allowance, which I was a little sad about but I guess my body was in need of the energy, with all the exercise I'd been doing.

Still I weighed in at 14st 0lbs (196lbs) on Monday so it seems I'm still managing to lose the weight. and I shouldn't worry, since my body obviously knows what it needs, although not so many packets of chocolate popcorn next time.

Can you please, stop the hammering.

I love swimming, the whole thing of floating in water, propelling yourself along using only the power of your arms and legs, its great and aside from the initial getting into the water, which tends to be cooler than you are, so is a little bit of a shock. The only thing I'm starting to get annoyed with, aside from my inability to do any stroke other than breast, is other people.

Not all of the other people you realise, that would be silly me using a public swimming pool, if I hated swimming amongst others, no, its the incredibly inconsiderate swimmers that go to the pool. If you swim you'll know what I mean, these are the people, who will come with a friend or two and then instead of staying together, they tend to swim with the width of another person between them, talking to each other. I'm not some grumpy old curmudgeon who thinks you should swim in silence, no but at least try and swim a bit closer together if you're going to slowly swim and talk.

Other people who annoy me are those who don't seem to be able to swim without drifting across the pool, its not that difficult to swim in a straight line surely, I try and avoid swimming in the space others are using but sometimes you can't help it, these people also have a tendency to not try and avoid you in anyway, which means you have to try and swim round them, so you don't end up kicking or hitting each other, so when people don't try and avoid you, it makes it more difficult to stick to your swimming line.

My local pool holds lessons for the school kids to help them learn to swim, which is brilliant since everyone should know how to avoid drowning, the downside is that the new pool gets cut in half length ways so you have even less space to swim, so when people are generally inconsiderate to others by not adjusting how they swim, I find myself enjoying my swim a lot less than I should.

I don't know if I'll ever manage a swim where I encounter no inconsiderate swimmers but I'm hoping there are fewer of them, if I go early in the morning.

I've also noticed that swimming seems to make me need the toilet, regardless of how many times I've been before getting into the pool, its even given me a rhyme, that I quote "need a shit, swim for a bit"